Decision Time Nexus

You know those times in your life you can look back on, and you can see exactly where specific pathways converged and diverged with specific actions or decisions on your part setting your feet on the path to where you are now?

And I don't mean that time you decided to pee on a tree, or cop a squat instead of taking a 10 mile detour to find a gas station with a toilet. I mean those points of time where major influences where at work that set MAJOR directions in your life.

We all have major decision times, but these are truly significant Nexi or Confluences of pathways that determine your lifes true path. These aren't just prevailing winds, this is the Jet-Stream of your life.

Well I'm hitting another one of those in the next few days, and for the first time in my life I don't know which direction I want it to take.

I'm a very Yes/No person. I've always been very clearly decisive. I don't see the world in black and white, but I see my own decisions that way. Things are either done or not. Cook or get out of the kitchen. Shit or get off the pot. As Yoda said, "Do or do not. There is no 'Try'".

I think I'm more stressed by not knowing what I want, than by waiting for others to tell me what they want me to do. The options I will supposedly be given are...
1. Promoted and stay in Thailand
2. Promoted and move to Shanghai, China
3. No local promotion but accept a transfer to USA to take on a new focus area globally
4. Quit, go back to USA and do my own thing.

All of those are good things. So how do I choose? All of them mean better quality of life, better education for my kids, and better career prospects. Item 4 means starting my own business which has rewards and risks all it's own, but comes with a heavy short term price tag that means the first few years will be very very tight financially, but the rewards long-term could exceed anything I can receive working for someone else. Its just the financial risk when I have a family to care for that worries me. The first 3 all mean better salary, benefits and dependent support.

So how do you choose when everything looks good, and you want all of them?

I've got gail-force winds, a clear sky, and I'm ready to sail, but my compass is broken.