I had nothing better to do so...

The weirdest thing happened to me yesterday…


I’d been having some stomach pain for a few days and thought maybe it was something I ate. I hadn’t (sorry for the nasty detail) pooped in days either. So I went to the hospital (in Thailand Dr.’s don’t have private offices, they all work out of the Hospitals). I got there and checked in with the receptionist.

She put my info and symptoms into the computer and walked me over to the Dr’s waiting room. When the nurse came in I also seemed to be experiencing a rather rapid pulse, and my heart was pounding. When she took my blood pressure she noted those symptoms on her pad as well.

Because I was also beginning to sweat (can't imagine why that would happen) a lot she called in another nurse
to take some blood for testing, and hook me up to an IV drip with some antibiotics since I was apparently losing a lot of fluids for some reason I was having trouble articulating.

She asked me to lie back on the table as she asked about my other less visible symptoms… I assume she meant the stomach pain I was experiencing. She began that weird poking and pushing on my stomach that medical people do, and every time she pushed on my lower left abdomen I’d grunt with the pain. She then smiled and asked me to wait just a moment as she went to speak with the doctor.

A minute later the Doctor came into the room and said the nurse thought I had blockage, but that she’d better check. Yep! Sure enough. She confirmed it. She suggested a colonic and called in a specialist to assist with the process.




I felt SOOOoooo much better after the process was completed. Though I was experiencing a weird sloshing sound and some trouble walking afterward. I didn’t really feel like driving home, so I hailed a passing taxi who then pulled over, and was kind enough to assist me into the car. Thailand being in the tropics, the uniforms are a bit lighter than what we’re all used to in the USA, but the service is good and the people friendly. You get used to it.

When I got home the maid opened the door feather duster in hand. I was surprised since it was now mid-afternoon and normally my wife is home. She said the Missus had gone to my daughter’s school and wouldn’t be back until later since they had to get her new school books, supplies, and get her measured for the new school uniform. I was just happy I didn’t have to do it – language issues and all that can be a real pain sometimes.




As I was about to walk upstairs and blog my experience for all my friends to commisurate on my miserable malady the doorbell rang. The maid was in the laundry room so I went to the door myself. I had forgotten right now it’s that time of year when Ho Scouts come around our neighborhood to sell their… um… cookies.


Whatever the reason I was glad I didn’t have to leave the house, which is probably a little devil whispering in my ear, it certainly wasn’t an angel, but at the time I didn’t care.




I wanted to be home so I could catch the replay of last night’s Oakland Raiders, Kansas City Chiefs football game. Which is weird because their seasons are over. But, we don’t get many games over here in Thailand so any game is worth watching. Especially since cheerleaders in the USA style haven’t completely caught on over here.





My wife and daughter finally got home, and we watched the news. One report was on how the local crime rate was up and the local jail was being upgraded and enlarged to manage the growth in the prisoner population, and the Police were looking to hire more security guards to handle the new facility.

With all that behind me (no pun intended), it was time to get the kids off to bed. I sometimes read my daughter a bedtime story. She has always loved Snow White. Yawn! Personally I've always felt The Wizard of Oz is better, and it was time for a new book. So, I grabbed a copy of the original Wizard of Oz by Frank L. Baum. What a great classic!





After the kids were asleep, Sunisa and I thought we’d watch a movie, we wanted something fun with some action – she picked Pirates of the Caribbean. Johnny Depp was awesome in that movie! And I’ve always had a thing for masted ships and black powder cannon from the age of sail.

Though even after seeing the Doctor and her willing supportive staff
I was still experiencing strange symptoms. I started hearing a weird buzzing sound in my ear. I couldn’t quite place it, and it kept getting louder and louder. Then my eyes snapped open as my wife shoved me out of the bed. It was all just a dream.

Whew! That whole (again no pun intended) rubber glove and colonic thing gives me chills. Chills? Hmmm… maybe I should go see the doctor?