Moms, Mums, Ma'ams and More

In preparation for Mother's Day, I offer the following fond remembrances. And in case I don't get to talk to you before the date... for all you wonderful Mothers out there... HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!


25 REASONS I LOVE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me: TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.'

2. My mother taught me: RELIGION.
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'

3. My mother taught me: TIME TRAVEL.
'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'

4. My mother taught me: LOGIC.
' Because I said so, that's why.'

5. My mother taught me: MORE LOGIC.
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.'

6. My mother taught me: FORESIGHT.
'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.'

7. My mother taught me: IRONY.
'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.'

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'

9. My mother taught me: CONTORTIONISM.
'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'

11. My mother taught me: WEATHER.
'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'

12. My mother taught me: HYPOCRISY.
'If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!'

13. My mother taught me: THE CIRCLE OF LIFE.
'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
'Stop acting like your father!'

15. My mother taught me: ENVY.
'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.'

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
'Just wait until we get home.'

17. My mother taught me: RECEIVING.
'You are going to get it when you get home!'

18. My mother taught me: MEDICAL SCIENCE.
'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.'

19. My mother taught me: ESP.
'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'

20. My mother taught me: DENTAL HYGENE.
'Don't you talk to me like that or I'll wash your mouth out with soap.'

21. My mother taught me: HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'

22. My mother taught me: GENETICS.
'I swear you're just like your father.'

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'

24. My mother taught me: WISDOM.
'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.'

25. And my favorite: My MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT JUSTICE
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you! '

What did your mother teach you? :-)

What "Love" Means...

A group of professionals posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, 'What does love mean?' The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined See what you think:

'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.'
- Rebecca- age 8

'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'
- Billy - age 4

'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.'
- Karl - age 5

'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.'
- Chrissy - age 6

'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.'
- Terri - age 4

'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.'
- Danny - age 7

'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss'
- Emily - age 8

'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.'
- Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)

'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,'
- Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)

'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.'
- Noelle - age 7

'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.'
- Tommy - age 6

'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.'
- Cindy - age 8

'My mommy loves me more than anybody You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.'
- Clare - age 6

'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.'
- Elaine-age 5

'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.'
- Chris - age 7

'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.'
- Mary Ann - age 4

'I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.'
- Lauren - age 4

'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.' (what an image)
- Karen - age 7

'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross.'
- Mark - age 6

'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.'
- Jessica - age 8

And the final one - a definite winner - was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, 'Nothing, I just helped him cry'

I think I'll ask my 5 year old what she thinks when I get home tonight. :-)